those good old "list N characters, answer [crack] questions about them, PROFIT" memes? can't do them anymore, what with being an unimaginative scatterbrain. after a certain small amount of bad ideas and batshit scenarios generated brain shuts down. some things, however...
simple questions, actually, like "Is Starrk hot? How hot?"
*meditates*
*thinks about great cosmic indifferent solitude*
*meditates some more*
yrs truly, easily distracted & confused.

~

life is, indeed, confusing. I fail a job interview, because I cannot sell shit. once everyone and their mother got that, I'm offered another opportunity... interview for a job with prior experience in marketing and sales required. o_0

Tags: fandom, rl
mood: blah

perhaps I should not be writing this while tired & angry, but very little in life happens at a perfect time.

( confused, not dazzled )

that said, I'd love to read on the Transformers's culture, tradition and religion, preferably re: current movieverse, if there is such thing. where do I start digging? besides the wiki?
[and from now on, I'm afraid, whenever I get to that bad, no good place I shall climb out of it remembering the ancient, harmonious and serene beauty of Optimus Prime. color me hopeless, do.]

Tags: fandom, writing
mood: tired

we live in a pretty fucked up world, gentlebeings, if not having a terrible life experience is considered a privilege. a special advantage some of us are just lucky to have. the last thing I want is to hurt someone who is already hurt, traumatized, suffering, and has to struggle every damn day for what must be a given human right. if I unintentionally do so and realize/am called on that, I'll apologize. being what I am, with my own bag of psychosocial issues, there is a chance I will offend. there also is a chance I won't catch on that rihgt away, because I do not know many things better adjusted people find natural. what I do know is how it is often impossible to respond immediately when you're hurt. when you recover you may or may not realize it was not an attack aimed at you, but either way the harm's already done. I'll apologize for that too. I will not apologize for being [presumed] lucky. I won't apologize by default.

there's also that nice little thing about not locked/filtered stuff in your personal journal being not just public space, but a fannish public ground. thank you. thank you for that one. no, dear fellow fans, my journal is my journal. if I fail as a decent / considerate / responsible human being here, somewhere it's not fan community-addressed, do not call me on that on behalf of fandom, please. [no, there's no separate fannish - or private - journal, nor there must be.]

I warn for potentially harmful - in my humble experience & opinion - content. beyond that we'll have to talk individually. in good faith.

( wherein accidents happen )

I care. I am trying to care better. I tend to care more when not guilt-tripped.

Tags: fandom
mood: cranky

the meme, continued.

( from Nanni )

Tags: fandom, meme
mood: contemplative
sound: Ministry - Jesus Built My Hotrod

'cause I did it in Russian first. let's see how the tone etc. shifts '-)

RULES: Comment and I'll LJ stalk you have a look at your journal info to find THREE FANDOMS you apparently love. And then you answer these questions about them!

01: What got you into this fandom in the first place?
02: Do you think you'll stay in this fandom or eventually move on?
03: Favorite episodes/books/movies/etc.?
04: Do you participate in this fandom (fanfiction, graphics, discussions)?
05: Do you think that more people should get into this fandom?

well, two answers will be the same for all fandoms ever, so:

02: Do you think you'll stay in this fandom or eventually move on?
I will definitely move on, but this fandom in some form will always stay with me: they never leave, nor do I.

05: Do you think that more people should get into this fandom?
I am an asocial lurker who sucks at advertising. but if new people get the fandom and get into it? welcome!

( from Z )

Tags: fandom, meme
mood: amused
sound: Garbage - Sleep Together

I am the kind of fan who has to be told fandom news by friends who are sometimes not even in that fandom, otherwise I'll stay happily oblivious until too late.
go me...

["...Somebody said they were close to me?" (c) Tugg Speedman]

Tags: fandom
mood: amused
sound: Pink - Sober

again, for all the... well, angst does not quite cut it! for all the heartwreck... and stuff...
...there are days when I want to give me crazy SToned fandom a big hug and flowers #-) 'cause *awwwwwwwww*, man '-)

Tags: fandom
mood: amused

my not-quite-fandom is *SToned*, and I love it.
"Would you --"
"-- fuck myself? In a heartbeat."
in different contexts, for different reasons, unbeknownst to each other... but me fandom thinks, of the same person, along those lines.
love, I'm telling you.
~
and I am brainstorming pr0n. in a different fandom altogether. where it does not quite write itself.
um.

*giggle*
*facepalm*

...and, knowing him, he would measure the heartbeats. precisely. perfectly.

*headdesk*

Tags: fandom, tfs
mood: amused
sound: Unheilig - Sage ja!

вынесено с дайрей и из остатков мозгов:
"вот оно, основное на данный момент отличие нашего скромного фэн-сообщества по Хеллбою от западного: у нас пишут слэш про Нуаду, у них - гет про Нуалу."
"А слэш они вообще не пишут при этом? Канонисты нах..."
...ыыЫ! (1) а я что говорила про картину мира?!
(2) оооо, история, скребущаяся коготками в мое подсознание, грешна и темъ, и другимъ, и сверхъ того. вам еще не страшно? а зря #-)
(3) и где пишут, где, а? ото ж...
короче, космополиты мы безродные, повернутые на всю голову, о да.

Maybe we believe
she was ready to go
In the morning light
Maybe you believe
That she was made of gold
In the east where you killed her...
...She speaks unrehearsed
Languages from skin
In the morning light...
(из той же оперы песни, что и умирающие сады... и ведь человек, подписавший меня на это, явно ничего плохого не имел в виду. ы!)

Tags: fandom, h2, бред
mood: amused

ну, почти. качаю черт-те-что, с которым без травы, возможно, и не разобраться. ага, это все по следам Одной ночи с...
кошмар и жуть.
премьеру ХБ2 сдвинули еще на месяц. это уже не песец, это я уже не знаю, как обозвать. господа кинопрокатчеги, WTF..?
сижу, курю... поставленный на паузу торрент порывается качаться едва ли не с большей скоростью, чем торренты активные. ве-се-ло...
...фотографии с конвента надо в порядок привести, а сил нет. ы.

еще из веселого: не стОит у профессионального писателя спрашивать, как писать фанфик. можно огрести, о даа. ибо фанфеги - мировое зло и паразиты на и без того хрупком теле нашей литературы, вотъ. не, ну Олди, ну... с другой стороны - а что прикажете на немудрый вопрос отвечать?
Но конь отвечал ему: "Ржу. Не могу." (с) imenno
(вот опять же: зачем вам фанфики? м? варианты: я хочу, чтобы это не кончалось; Профессор автор был неправ; не бывает второстепенных героев; с точки зрения меня; а что, если..? добавьте, пожалуйста. имхо, цель оправдывает определяет методы написания. подумавши, вполне можно вписаться в классический - пардон - мастер-класс.)

(ууууууууууу... к слову о мастер-классах: я, как варвар, театра не понимающий, на Диск-конвенте обязательно бываю на мастер-классе Стивена Бриггса. просвещаюсь, проникаюсь и развиваюсь культурно. ибо Стивен Бриггс бывает всем театром - и драконом! - в одном лице...
но не на этот раз. на этот раз Стивен с удивлением узнал о том, что у него будет мастер-класс, за несколько часов до начала оного класса. как он это делает..! #-) словом, вместо чего-бы-то-ни-было получился разговор о - мммм! - картографии Диска вообще и двуединого города в частности. мну, конечно, вспомнило Стоппарда и заговор картографов о вымышленном Английском королевстве - и поплыло... а что делать, когда с одной стороны на экране буквально растет и расцветает город - и о, видЕние немножко волшебной карты, в нужных местах раскрывающейся вкладками с подробностями! - а с другой стороны человек, это натворивший, рассказывает и показывает, как все было, и - пол-царства за блокнот и карандаш, потому что его нужно рисовать, именно в движении... пластика, которая практически есть графика...
...а потом помянули (трехмерную?) карту подземной части Анк-Морпорка. и Google maps #-)
и на десерт - вполне возможную американскую перезапись "ранних" романов о Плоском Мире в исполнении сами-знаете-кого. неужели я доживу до, скажем, Jingo - и вообще всего цикла о городской страже... и умру в один прекрасный день от аудиогазма!)
что-то я увлекся... #-)
а то есть, например, недописанное типа эссе о фейрях...

да, еще к слову о фанфиках: где-то как-то... хотя бы непростые отношения тех же Олдей с разнообразной мифологией. я только хочу сказать, что (хорошей) легенде свойственно вдохновлять. насколько удачно - другой вопрос!

Tags: dwcon2008, fandom
mood: cranky
sound: Serj Tankian - Lie Lie Lie

рыская по интернетам в поисках адекватных спойлеров ко вторым Секретным материалам, моя, во-первых, обломалась, ибо ничего связного и нового для себя не узнала...
...а во-вторых, окончательно убедилась, что и кино тоже смотрит не по правилам. ибо оценивает и кино тоже в первую очередь "по легенде": если зацепило - неважно что - и не отпускает, и затмевает возможные провисы и ляпы, то фильм-таки хорош весьма. если никак не затмевает, но присутствует, то фильм не полная лажа имеет право на существование. и все оттенки между.
учитывая лед, кровь, снег и потерянный вид у Малдера, у вторых "Иксов" есть шанс #-) серьезно же, мне академически интересно весьма, чего - и почему! - люди хотят от этого фильма. высокого, пардон, кино? откровений и открытий? хорошего триллера, чтоб дух захватывало? снова взглянуть на знакомые лица? доброго старого межпланетного заговора? м?
я почти знаю, чего хочу я...
( а еще )

...и я, конечно, варвар недобрый, но когда во вроде бы серьезной, с претензией, рецензии натыкаюсь на выражение "скрепя зубами", воспринимать ее всерьез уже не могу. так и представляю автора, скрипящего сердцем.
ик...

Tags: fandom, xf
mood: amused

...знаю, что не стОит, а поздно уже.

( ыть: от читателя )

Tags: fandom, ff, xf
mood: awake
sound: Sarah McLachlan - Black

so I have accidentally read another article on fanfiction. so shoot me. it has a very, very good point, demonstrating how fanfiction is just another extension of perception/interpretation process triggered by exposure to cultural phenomena. we receive information -> we react, to some extent, in a way or another. sometimes fanfiction comes out of it. all hail noosphere?
so it is, all in all, a v.decent article. an informed & open-minded look from the outside.
right.
but why. why, of all things fannish, must it mention The X-Files that often, and M/Sk in particular?
*facepalm* it is not a nice thing to do to a person hungry & high, no, precious. [no, really, why M/Sk as the example of XF slash? in various [Russian] sources, too. my academic curiosity is piqued, dammit.]

I do need a big box of Bacardi Breezer to finish Season 9, and I want a Laced With Adamantium XF t-shirt #-)

Tags: fandom, xf
mood: cranky
sound: SOAD - Innervision

и где же была найдена и моментально скачана музыка из "Тысячелетия"? правильно, в русском сообществе по "Секретным материалам", ибо.
горжусь.
затем, конечно, мну занесло в украинское сообщество по "Секретным материалам"...
(Якщо ви бачили смерть Малдера, то це був не Малдер.
Якщо це був Малдер, то це була не смерть.)
...потому что.
#-)
(ну вот... стоило возгордиться, и ляп - мой родной народ снова пишет мягкий знак в третьем лице & настоящем времени возвратных глаголов.)

---

я существо неприхотливое, но голодное. что делать, если фанфег гораздо проще найти, чем эссе на тему? от то ж... параллели, блин, между Feet of Clay и S.R. 819. косвенное доказательство бытия Л-пространства #-)

---

а еще я наконец-то посмотрела "Черную кошку, белого кота". это не передаваемый словами восторгъ! это - самое оно... ( спойлеръ )

---

...но саунд. крышу уносит нежно.

Tags: fandom, videogasm, xf
mood: content
sound: MILLENNIUM MAIN THEME

mind works in mysterious ways. I see a weirdness warning or complaint and brace myself for the thrill, surprise & maybe terror incognita [for example, calling something XF-related weird above & beyond usual raises hopes high]... and then it isn't there. I either perceive the subject as normal or at least get it, even if I can't quite explain it to somebody else. the doors of perception must be of an interesting shape.
mean, I am trying to download something pretty much condemned as a piece of WTF crap... and I wonder. I wonder like hell.
addiction: still a bad thing to have #-S
~
then there's been talk - again, is it seasonal or what? - about fanfiction, and I wondered - wandered '-) - way back. I feel unqualified, academically, to discuss strict literary merits of, there. maybe I am just a compulsive reader with some taste & eye for good writing. maybe my definition of good ficwriting includes acknowledgement & respect for the source [and the language]. sometimes "I like it" and "it's well-written/well done" even agree. [yes, please.] it's subjective and personal, right. [in particular, I wonder why parody is more acceptable - by some - than any other form/genre. how filk or my humorous JRRT-based verse is okay as a reaction and something like Black Captain is not. and these people tolerate movie adaptations, mind. *headdesk*]
[and I still do not understand why people who dig RPG have such aversion to fanfiction. aside from encountering way too much bad writing..?]
ah, well. unqualified.
~
but speaking of writing, I've hit rock bottom a kind of wall. witness nefarious intent defeated by, of all things, human physiology. rejoice. having not slept nearly enough for two weeks in a row, I feel for people wanting nothing more than hopefully long hours of sleep undisturbed once they can afford it. [can they? what day of the week are we talking about? does it even matter, considering..? ah, the joys of stealing into someone else's world, indeed!]
still, despite all things rational, the intent is there. so I wonder how to go about it. aye, in obvious & pressing presence of better other things to do.
shoot me.

Tags: fandom
mood: cranky
sound: VNV Nation - End of Days

there are times when I realize I am fundamentally wrong about something or in my approach to it. which, alas, does not at all mean I stop involving myself in said something. human interaction in general, for one '-) computer sciences. writing. etc., slash among them.
I was sort of - typically - late to the party, discovering the wonders in my last year at the Uni, at the supposedly healthy age of 21.5. then again, being a hardcore fan of Star Wars and Tolkien for years, I discovered the definition and worldwide phenomenon of fandom at about the same time. wrong, I tell you '-)
but slash: it hooked me first & foremost as another possibility of experiment in storytelling, and my perception has not changed much in 9 years of subjecting myself to all shades of the phenomenon. which means that somehow I am still getting it wrong. which fact and my own blurry sexuality do not stop me. just makes it very, verrry difficult to find the right fix, because while I will read everything, provided the writing is good, weird me longs for writing as organically close to canon as possible, a natural extension if you will. because sometimes, slash goggles or not, the potential just is there. not always sensible and/or sane, but it is, and who am I to deny people the folly [and not even an ultimate one, some canon considered]?
it's just damn hard to find. I'd say because - again - I want something that does not exist, but I can't look at selected source material and understand why it doesn't.
er. what am I doing fundamentally wrong, and where can I get a bigger/better shovel?

Tags: fandom
mood: awake
sound: XF - Main Theme

я ворчу, а что делать? человек - существо пристрастное. я нежно люблю и ВК со товарищи, и "Звездные войны", и "Пиратов Карибского моря", и "Маленькие трагедии", и Булгакова, и Эко, и ПТерри... етц... о, да, а еще есть разнообразная мифология\легендариум и Г.Л.Олди, долгой им жизни и доброго здравия. а потом находятся славные, здравомыслящие люди, от избытка чувств выдающие такое, что ой.
оно, конечно, все фигня, но где Лукас и где ВК и что они все курили? слава Богу, каждый создал свой мир в меру своих сил и способностей, и за мир этот ответил, и делить им вроде бы нечего..? аи, господа лингвисты, подскажите пожалуйста, как по-эльфийски будет "полувысокое искусство"?
(ну вот. пробежалась по словарям, и ворчать почти расхотелось. слова для "halved art" есть, представления, как их правильно соединить, нет ни малейшего. мы варвары, не ламатьявно нам... ритм хорош, однако... никому нах не нужен одичавший словоблуд рифмоплет с сомнительными гондорскими корнями?)
у меня, конечно, температура, и я, конечно, гоню, но при чем Лукас к изврату творчеству Питера Джексона с компанией, мну не догоняеть... Лукас вроде бы на эпос не замахивался оно само приползло и вивисекции классике не делал?
(а вот "пересекся" у меня ВК почему-то в первую очередь именно с Войнами. Любовь Первая и Любовь Вторая?)
...и вообще, даешь позитив и крышесъездъ!


...мяу.

Tags: fandom, lotr, sw
mood: cranky

so... I has HP7 in easily readable if not legal form. for curiosity, satisfaction of. we shall see...
~
but what I really would love to know is: what you do when you come, fandom-wise, late to the party. when you get into something that's been there all along yet hit you just now. when so much cool & awesome stuff has already happened, about a year ago, and all you're left with are archives. [and thank goodness for those, for things on the net are most fleeting, but!] I'd love to know how you cope and don't climb a wall and find a way out.
because it feels like standing in a great dark hall full of distant echoes.
because reading someone read your soul years ago, again, kind of hurts. et cetera.

Tags: fandom
mood: cranky
sound: the sound of silence

* watch World of Warcraft vids.
* drink, esp. considering how little & how long ago you last ate.
* read metafandom. unlike WoW vids, it's actually bad for my temper.
* procrastinate in every way possible #-) I have backpack unpacked, luggage unmarked [still piss'd at some fcker who stole my nice gay ribbon from the bag last time I traveled to London], memory cards to clean, and music to mix for the trip. plus, I'm really, truly down on reading. Cannery Row goes with me, but other than that - ?! and I totally forgot about approx. 5 hours in transit in Zurich. don't follow my sad example. be prepared.
[of course, I could drink myself stiff on coffee & write something awesome/awful. wheee... only coffe doesn't quite work for me. still, the writing option stays.]
~
speaking of writing, public presence, advertising etc... when someone says, "We offer the greatest there is!" I wonder. not "we aim for it" or suchlike, but "we got it." I wonder exactly what criteria & methods they use to deliver. especially when the, ah, venture is a fiction archive with vague submission/acceptance guidelines. in the case of FanLib, I wanna know what backs the pretentious "The world's greatest fan fiction by popular demand" up. [1] how do they mean 'the world's greatest'? exactly how are they better than other ff archives? and [2] by popular demand FTW..? was there, or had there suddenly appeared this great unsatisfied popular demand for fan fiction only FanLib can deal with? I admit to living under a rock, but not to the degree of not noticing something like that big one.
mean, there could well be good intentions & purposes behind the venture, besides making money by & for a group of nice concerned people. if all this effort & publicity helped to wash the 'bastard child of creativity', 'freaky pastime', 'merely petty intellectual theft' and similar brands off the phenomenon of fan fiction, it would be much welcome. IMHO. but as it is now, wobbly and legally shifty and not quite writer-friendly, not to mention the eye-watering site design, the biggest thing it seems to do is piss off fan writers. fckin' A+.
huh, considering how 'much' I write or, indeed, actively participate in fandom, it's strange for the issue to affect me so. maybe if there was more fannsih presence about the venture, it wouldn't feel so much like barging in. if they care so much about fandom, let it show? can the group behind FanLib tell us what their fandoms are, for example? somewhere in the About section, up front? can they list some of online events that bring fans together with well-known creators and brands from the entertainment world before relaying the reader to the press page and be out & proud about it? you don't cry "We are the shit!" and then go all humble about it. and since the venture is specifically about fan fiction, I'd like to know who the group's fan fiction experts are. no, really, if there are great people working for the greater good of fandom, I'd love to know about them.
~
but not right now.
memory cards are clean, so that leaves... everything else to complete, and it's nearing midnight. ow #-)

[oh, I lie, one last shot: there is, for example, skyehawke. I had to work for admission, and lazy amateur writer me considered that worth the effort. there are/were several other places I'm proud of being/having been part of, if in a very small way. FL just makes me feel icky. ah, well]

have cut a bag from Magic Palace for luggage marking. the irony '-)

oh-kay... over & out till June, methinks '-)

Tags: fandom
mood: rushed

*weeps with joy* Russian LOTR fandom makes best. songs. ever. and when crystal-clear voices join and rise to heaven, singing a damn good made with love parody of some classic, my heart can't help but swell.
~
turns out you can cap the 12 Days of Hogswatch clips.
( like this. )
...squee?
~
for dear Zachary, who had probably seen them already, but bis repetita placent and all that...
draw me a Sith Lord! or a lamb #-)
~
that it?..
I'm so absurdly happy at the mo, I wish I could give it away in bundles. meep.

Tags: dw, fandom, recs, sw
mood: content
sound: ...Не Ородруин ли это?

sorry, sorry, sorry, the Discworld side of this thread is killing me dead. an entirely different picture of the fandom emerges, and I feel like I've been living under a rock for past several years. a big rock, but still... maybe the Moon #-)

'a bit' indeed #-)

Tags: fandom
mood: amused
sound: Rolling Stones - 19th Nervous Breakdown

apathy wtf..?! and body, if you absolutely have to sleep half a day, could you please extract some pleasure from it & not feel beaten up?
...
... .... ...
...fandom in haiku?

after all, we are
flesh and blood, but some of us
just keep coming back.
~
cream, honey, brandy,
ashes, wine, a dash of blood
before dark chocolate.
~
a long time ago
in a story told backwards
there'd be only stars.
~

that, and some fiddling with the layout, and a new icon.
I feel rotten #-S

Tags: fandom, mine, poetry
mood: exanimate

a fandom meme from guede_mazaka: double the pleasure, double the fun... and again, it's harder than it looks!

current fandoms: they tend to accumulate. the always there shiny ones be Star Wars, Discworld, and Lord of the Rings the book. and the legend of Dracula, several versions of '-) PotC, OUaTiM, HP, BDS, Star Trek TOS, Verne, Dumas and quite a few others lurk, but are ready to leap forth at short notice. sometimes even as batshit crazy plot bunnies...

my first fandom ever: Star Wars. it was not the first love, but a most true one, and one that made me go out and do something about it.

my most recent fandom: ahem. that would be Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy the book with consequences, if such thing as involuntary fandom does exist. it has... gatecrashed my mixed mental party, and refuses to leave. we're very much in love-hate-wtf.

five fandoms that mean a lot to me: Star Wars. Discworld. LotR. Ravenous. OUaTiM. the elements you'd find in my blood.

tag five people: everyone who wants it is welcome, including black_dragon, z_u, serennau, autiotalo, and nara_cat, if they stop by.

~

mraow.

Tags: fandom, meme
mood: calm
sound: Inxs - By My Side