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Write or Die's evil sounds are fun #-) of course, of course I failed to write 500 words in 15 minutes, but I'm getting there! OMG, once it's... made into an actual story [for a given value of story], I might well have about 1/2K of bingo goodness. fun neh '-) the amazing thing, as always, is the story surprising the hell out of me. "so that is what you were about"-like. at least this time I'm positive it's just thoughts on the subject surfacing in some order, but to watch them do so is no less fascinating. hello, weirdo handsome. now we need to get you a title, oh dear. PS: ahhahaha, I was worried about *water*? I should not have #-) Tags: writing
mood:  amused
sound: unheilig - sieh in mein gesicht
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why is Amazon trying to sell me porn?? it looks too crass & obnoxious to be anything else. has heat-induced brainmelt reached the States as well? *eyeroll* and the Brits persuade me to go get The Ultimates 2, part 2. the one with lightsabers, and rainbows, and Tony's amazing eye color changes, yes... still, *eyeroll* ~ online quizzes are fun. [*grumble* really, is there a time limit, like in Write or Die, to type a quiz? because 95% of them look like something fired off, probably at gunpoint, and never ever revised. I just wonder.] even when a quiz says I scored as somebody else entirely, it displays the highest score for... right #-) Tony and I, we confuse the internets, albeit for different reasons. so I'm 92% like Tony or Reed, closely followed by... Wolverine #-) then there's 67% of Deadpool, Gambit and Nick Fury, and a lesser dose of, equally, Professor X, the Punisher, Spider-Man and the Hulk. and 33% of either the Sentry or Steve Rogers. o_0 scary Marvel '-) ~ ( grumble )~ it's too hot to live. come on. one of your bingo candidates is set in the Arctic Ocean, go for it '-) mood:  hot
sound: как веруем и мы сами, не ведая, что творим
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I dreamt I lived in a country where it snowed 10 weeks a year. maybe more. for the rest of the year the snow just lay there '-) and it was so fine. so good. I not only survived, I actually enjoyed living there #-) suppose it was so incredibly cold you stopped noticig after a while. also, don't know wth is with gender switch in dreams, but this time I was definitely male. walking topless in winter... yes, sure. ~ have met a third cousin of mine. he's a really cute and all around nice guy. he trains a junior tennis team, sings opera, speaks half a dozen languages, loves swimming and dancing. he resides in Sweden but will stay here till 26.07.09. and he looks more like an Israeli than most of us '-) aw, exotic family. ~ I still am a terrible snob when it comes to writing/reading, and a grammar Nazi. somebody shoot me already #-( ~ and last night, dear diary, we went to see Public Enemies. ( deary me. )~ I really, really should be writing me bingo. instead I grumble about text formatting and contemplate not-quite-natural things to do to Tony. bad fan, no... nothing, really. *headdesk* Tags: dream, rl, tfs, videogasm
mood: amused
sound: Unheilig - Herz aus Eis
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someday a Marvel spawn creation will make me want to take it home & money be damned, not to take the book/multivolume collection and beat its authors senseless with it, just in case. someday, but not today. alas. ~ on the other hand, Tomorrow Men deliver. just when I'm about to grit me teeth & grumble about certain writing tricks abuse the book goes & says something good. nice timing, if anything. someday I must write a review of sorts. ( aww. )~ and then there's this third hand... it is, basically, a thinly veiled black plot hole. but it's got two cases of classic romance that won't take "no" for an answer and refuse to die stay in my idea morgue. *sigh* I want a purple t-shirt saying, 'Til All Are Gone. *headdesk* Tags: bad idea, tfs, ttf
mood:  tired
sound: Unheilig - Astronaut
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when a character reminds me of Robert April [of Star Trek novels], Steve Rogers [a.k.a. Captain America] and Qui-Gon Jinn [of Star Wars prequels] all at once, the only thing it means for certain is my head's a big mess. ~ what I think fascinates me in both Transformers and Star Wars is the undeniable physical evidence of some cosmic sense. it is not exactly something this here RL needs, but. but it's nice to see it there. ~ I am also developing an allergic reaction to the words Marvel continuity, mostly because these days more often than not it means " crapconfusion ahead." gods, I need to get writing :-( Tags: ttf
mood:  cranky
sound: Transformers OST, the opera
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still recovering. still floundering. have, for a change, had a nervous breakdown. ain't life fascinating. on the other hand, " Reborn and down" could be an interesting experience. [on the third hand, my source of fresh comic goodness is conveniently dead. ah-ha...] ~ the Transformers are a somewhat suicidal civilization. o_0 ~ the funny thing is, I just might like movieverse TTf for the same reasons I love SW. now that's interest ing, because my love for SW has got very little to do with tech #-) ~ am still mildly pissed off by the fact that Batshit Romance would've made a perfect bingo story. who knew, who knew! ~ had a mixed reading of Transformers, Courtney Crumrin and The Graveyard Book. do not try that at home #-S Tags: readmaniac, rl
mood:  sick
sound: Unheilig - Stille Nacht Heilige Nacht
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recovery periods suck. no matter what I write, no matter how long a story is or how long the actual writing takes me, no matter how well [or not] it turns out, there always is this flatline interval of writing impotence lasting from a few days to over a week. which is why I'll never be able to write professionally, because it's an everyday work continuous process that cannot afford wipeouts after every few paragraphs. okay. but a total wipeout after something that flowed freely, took about half an hour to put together and warmed a few hearts still feels bloody unfair. if I continue like this it will take till August to write 5 times 500+ words. [and while quite a few bingo prompts are inspiring, I've managed to make one full line with the rest scattered all over the place. can we say "not-quite-epic but fail"?] I need to find a balance of sorts, a healthy dose of emotional involvement in my own writing, so as to be good for something afterwards. I wish I had an idea of how to go about it. ~ canonic grumble: a-argh! so, character A is special, because he is an X. what is X, and what's so special about it? decades of canon say X is a rank usually bestowed upon a carrier of the artifact Y. artifact Y is, apparently, unique, like a projection of divinity itself or something. fine. but there were precedents when several persons of the rank X existed independently at the same time. canonically. then there is our character A, who is not, for all we know, in possession of Y [or a replica of Y, or whatever], yet he is so X it's mindblowing. *headdesk* can decades of canon please be clear on the subject? or do I just go, "With all respect, screw you, I'm writing my own"? ~ I'm becoming allergic to the word privilege. ~ *stares at a WIP* now this is interest ing. do I warn for character death by default, because that's how he perceives it, or for suicide, because that's how it would look like? dear potential readers, I do care about you, but this is so not a problem I had in mind when I started this! [aside from the fact that the fandom itself needs a Weird Shit Happens! warning, and a character death - canonically! - often is not the worst thing that can happen to a character... I know. shoot me. back to lurking.] ~ *stares hard at NOT-a-WIP* no, guys. you do not get to compare near death experiences. (I hate making something up only to have canon confirm that tenfold #-) no, you do not get to upgrade the object of your crush so's you could have a romantic walk among the stars. why do I even try? Tags: bad idea, writing, бред
mood:  exanimate
sound: Unheilig - Die Macht
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perhaps I should not be writing this while tired & angry, but very little in life happens at a perfect time. ( confused, not dazzled )that said, I'd love to read on the Transformers's culture, tradition and religion, preferably re: current movieverse, if there is such thing. where do I start digging? besides the wiki? [and from now on, I'm afraid, whenever I get to that bad, no good place I shall climb out of it remembering the ancient, harmonious and serene beauty of Optimus Prime. color me hopeless, do.] Tags: fandom, writing
mood: tired
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we live in a pretty fucked up world, gentlebeings, if not having a terrible life experience is considered a privilege. a special advantage some of us are just lucky to have. the last thing I want is to hurt someone who is already hurt, traumatized, suffering, and has to struggle every damn day for what must be a given human right. if I unintentionally do so and realize/am called on that, I'll apologize. being what I am, with my own bag of psychosocial issues, there is a chance I will offend. there also is a chance I won't catch on that rihgt away, because I do not know many things better adjusted people find natural. what I do know is how it is often impossible to respond immediately when you're hurt. when you recover you may or may not realize it was not an attack aimed at you, but either way the harm's already done. I'll apologize for that too. I will not apologize for being [presumed] lucky. I won't apologize by default. there's also that nice little thing about not locked/filtered stuff in your personal journal being not just public space, but a fannish public ground. thank you. thank you for that one. no, dear fellow fans, my journal is my journal. if I fail as a decent / considerate / responsible human being here, somewhere it's not fan community-addressed, do not call me on that on behalf of fandom, please. [no, there's no separate fannish - or private - journal, nor there must be.] I warn for potentially harmful - in my humble experience & opinion - content. beyond that we'll have to talk individually. in good faith. ( wherein accidents happen )I care. I am trying to care better. I tend to care more when not guilt-tripped. Tags: fandom
mood: cranky
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today just about everyone called me: people I no longer work with, my insurance company, a bookstore, and my BFF in a pear tree with a stylistic/syntactic question '-) the one person who should've called me, though, - a job hunting consultant - didn't. ah, well. the bookstore ppl say they have the second part of Alumen for me. and Transformers 2 premiere's tomorrow. all sweet. ~ I've built an interactive map/organizer for the bingo. technically it's great, completion-wise it looks sad: prompt/story ratio is not good, and certain lines are mutually exclusive. argh for 9 years of math studies turning up uninvited #-) [speaking of uninvited, a vidlet to a Russian song will not do, will it?] *crawls away* Tags: rl, writing
mood: tired
sound: Михаил Щербаков - Школа Танцев-2
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dear self, you signed up for Cliché Bingo. not Kink Bingo. remember? remember why you did not sign up for Kink Bingo? keep that in mind, will ya? also, while you have filled a page with damn weird ideas, you have yet to complete a single line. [insert *headdesk* here] [ah... though now that I've recalled some HB2-inspired things, it might not be a problem after all.] also, if you write that Ultimates... thing... for 'hallucinations/visions'... no, if you dare post that thing... I shall despair of you #-) [well, either way that's better than Luke Skywalker & Leia Organa having hot cerebral sex in an awesomely insane SW AU... wait, does this count for 'telepathy'?] Tags: writing
mood: cranky
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have - finally - seen Disney's Beauty and the Beast. [yes, I live under a rock in a temporal stream different from the rest of the world.] I cannot imagine what it took to draw and paint the film by hand, that's plain awesome. ...and that's where it all goes downhill, because I found the Beast more beautiful and certainly more interesting than the prince. ah. somewhere out there, maybe online, have to be alternate renditions of the old, old story. *recalls Gaiman's Snow White* but even so, as the film ended with a stained glass picture of the happy couple and the magic flower, I could not hellp thinking, "They lived happily ever after and called the castle Rose Red..." #-) my, my, that bingo has the potential of being all kinds of wrong #-) Tags: бред
mood: amused
sound: Vanessa Mae - Jamais
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today was... interesting. against better judgment caught up on comics reading, gave myself a headache, got [yet again] into this lovely curl-up-and-die corner, climbed out, been reminded that I'm one snobby bitch when it comes to art :( went out & about, walked quite a lot in lovely Israeli summer sun, finally bought sunscreen #-) the sun must've got to me, though, because sometime later I recalled something that perfectly summed up my feelings for Reborn. it's the ending of a poem by Vladimir Mayakovsky, [the] Russian Futurist [ aye] from early XX. I wish I could offer an adequate translation, I really do. how ever, having faced those feelings, I now can be kind of hopeful about it :) go figure. also, if I ever mix up Reborn and Unborn, which can happen, ![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif) black_dragon just might kill me after all~ and then, still reeling from the sun and the surprise poetic trip, I signed up for ![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/community.gif) cliche_bingo [discovered via jazzypom]. you can too, till 26.06.09. it's all about tropes we know and love, it's personal and random, it supports IDIC fandom and medium diversity, word count starts at 500, and the deadline is flexible '-) [now let's see if I fail that. *quite a few fandoms of one raise heads and sniff the air*] Tags: writing, бред
mood:  high
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Israeli bureaucratic machine is sloooooooooow. e.g., in an office stuffed with computers, maintaining a sensible online presence & connected to all manner of other institutions I still have to come in person to communicate my data to various clerks. and I can safely bet the very data had been stored for weeks in their database. fcking yay. ~ have sketched a script for the fanvid, am now afraid to touch it. like MA, the movieverse used to be a happier place - well, at first sight, - and here I... n-aww... oh, *headdesk* n. ~ and then there were zombies. in Ankh-Morpork. ...WAIT. there ARE zombies in Ankh-Morpork. a few well-known citizens, in fact... ...okay, there were rabid zombies in A-M. the devour-you-and-your-braaaaaains kind. zombie dogs even. *facepalm* you see what happens there? my subconscious does get contaminated with Marvel ideas, but it runs to the Disc. how mad is that? [poor Lord Vetinari was not amused. not bitten either, though. damn, once in a while I dream of the man in his natural habitat & all, and there have to be zombies all around. bloody mood killers!] Tags: dream, dw, rl
mood:  lazy
sound: Greensleeves ♥
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Sony Vegas it is, and it goes like this: - oh thank God, a program that finally works!
- and it works with my source files too!
- ...but how do you..? oh, there's Help. with a search function.
- ...and Google, you idiot.
- no, no, no, yes, that was a nice Premiere feature, but here things are done differently.
- oh squee! I have switched to frames! I'll have this vid by numbers yet...
- wow, we can do split, video/audio ungroup, unstick clips... wow.
- dissolve, darling. fade in & out. now your frame-to-frame cut does not jump. good cut...
- omg, omg, I think I can do it...
- ...and save. save sometime before you exit the program in a couple of hours?
- deary me. I've put together roughly 15 seconds of vid [out of approx. 3.5 minutes] and am ridiculously proud of
myself it.
there's no cure for it, is there? Tags: omg vidding
mood:  creative
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title: One-night Stand of Truth author: elefwinrating: R fandom: there is no fandom. based on & inspired by Only You. shoot me. disclaimer: I'm not sure who owns the thing & the whole of the thing, but it ain't me. caution: slash. fluff. loose morals & too many drinks. no beta, so let me know if it contains any crimes against English & Italian languages, common sense, humanity etc. summary: when your heart is broken and your balls are busted on a fine summer night, what do you do? drink it off, then sleep it off... what else? ( oh dear. )~ ...no, really. shoot me. Tags: ff, mine, бред
mood:  crazy
sound: Imogen Heap - Headlock
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I have tried my hand at vidding! the yay: I am not sick of me sources [yet]. the sound *is* on a loop in my head, but that's normal. I also had major doubts about the project, what with my 0 experience and weird tastes... but once I put *some* of the video & audio together it became clear they were, indeed, made to be '-) the nay: something is rotten in my dear friend's version of Premiere Pro [yes, I had to start effing big]. apparently, something is even worse with my video source, because up close that mixed-up .avi looks *scary*. when I get home I'll try something... less professional. no beta, but the fic has grown a title & will be posted as is. the title wanted to be in Italian - naturally, - but I could not find an exact translation and am not gonna screw up linguistically as well '-) [the *other* fic is stuck not in the least thanks to pangs of consciousness. turns out I do not mind killing people - on paper, - but subjecting one Mr. Rogers to such amount of mindfuck is a no. *headdesk*] I miss the sea - and friends beyond. Tags: rl
mood: tired
sound: Unheilig - Stark
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Vulcans and Romulans, Romulans and Vulcans... and telepathic mutants #-) because it's been said that, while telepathy certainly sounds cool, in reality it would totally suck, overloading & disorienting one's brain and fucking thought process for good. yes, if one only had to face the effects. but if the cause is a transformation [re]building the body to [instinctively | subconsciously | automatically] control and manage the power, why not? [same with other powers, really: humans imagining/wishing for something they are not/cannot be ready for, physically, mentally or spiritually... don't you wish I started reading comic books as a kid, not a 30+ someone with baggage & too much time on her hands?] and then there are Vulcans [and, subsequently, Romulans]. now, I know Trek canon is big and tricky, and I do not claim to be well-versed in it, but just to think. as far as I know, a long time ago it was one race, and it had yet not had fine Vulcan mental disciplines and techniques, but it sure as hell was telepathic. speech, IIRC, was a secondary development, so... Romulans. unless biology works very, very differently in Trek verse, Romulans must be predisposed to touch telepathy and have the right 'ware' built in. could it have atrophied completely, and why? I'd like some good reasons. or possible references to this ability in Romulan culture. because it's not, I think, something a species would just give up... thoughts & ideas? Tags: trek
mood:  awake
sound: Offspring - Why Don't You Get a Job
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is there a club or something? for those who mean to write a PWP and end up researching & pulling hair because that plot hole over there has to be filled dammit? on the other hand, the good news be I have one of those PWPs completely outlined, so it can be written. and then I'll go to a warm place for mentioning arachnophobia during oral sex, but that's okay '-) ~ on the third hand, ( Trek... )~ and on that next hand, Marvel... Meet-Up... OMGWTFLOL, and *headdesk*. ouch. Tags: trek, writing, бред
mood:  okay
sound: Wuthering Heights OST
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'cause I did it in Russian first. let's see how the tone etc. shifts '-) RULES: Comment and I'll LJ stalk you have a look at your journal info to find THREE FANDOMS you apparently love. And then you answer these questions about them! 01: What got you into this fandom in the first place? 02: Do you think you'll stay in this fandom or eventually move on? 03: Favorite episodes/books/movies/etc.? 04: Do you participate in this fandom (fanfiction, graphics, discussions)? 05: Do you think that more people should get into this fandom? well, two answers will be the same for all fandoms ever, so: 02: Do you think you'll stay in this fandom or eventually move on?I will definitely move on, but this fandom in some form will always stay with me: they never leave, nor do I. 05: Do you think that more people should get into this fandom?I am an asocial lurker who sucks at advertising. but if new people get the fandom and get into it? welcome! ( from Z )Tags: fandom, meme
mood: amused
sound: Garbage - Sleep Together
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I have to say this: I like our local Social Services office. maybe I got lucky today, but wth. they were tidy, organized, fast & efficient. plus, the office's just across the road from the marina. can't go wrong with that, and the morning sea is beautiful. quiet. serene. with long waves of sparkling translucent blue-green rolling in, dreamily, slowly... sweet. me: "So, what do I do now?" social service clerk: "Why, nothing." thank you. it's... novel, to be told specifically that '-) meep. Tags: rl
mood:  mellow
sound: Say When
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I should be sleeping, right. ~ no matter what I google, it's a fair bet there will be a Stark reference among search results. past unexpected and right into disturbing. dear universe, we've had this talk before, cut it out. ~ dear character, no. I understand that you feel like you need three arms, but you cannot have an extra one. you're a smooth operator, figure it out. ~ dear social networking sites, *facepalm*. "Batman added a comment to your page" is way past ridiculous. ~ the sunset was... weird and graphically beautiful: pale greys, slate blue, shades of gold, lines sharp and clear, shapes perfect... now I wonder if I ever see a perfect sunrise, for reference '-) Tags: tfs
mood: cranky
sound: Placebo - Sleeping With Ghosts
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while the cable company technician was taking care of the... well, cable business, I made another attempt to locate this book in the house. still no luck, still cannot believe I could actually *not have* it. ah, well, someday. what I did find, though, was a printout of some YIM logs 2-3 years old, and - damn, it's so fcking sad. because I do not even know whether the man I happily chatted with is still alive. because those were the times of creative madness sweet, and I got dreams come true - to illustrate the writing I loved. because there were expectations and so much hope... and now it's all gone, all gone, and I'm still here, and I remember. on the one hand, I am a terrible friend. on the other? I'm always there, just like in master Cohen's song, so you'd know where [not] to go. sucking: let me tell you about itmood:  nostalgic
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thanks to the good, good people who helped me to drag myself out of the emo black hole yesterday. ♥ and today, for contrast, we have... Iron Slick of Sinfest fame. I kid thee not. *facepalm* ~ in other news, our cable TV cum phone cum internet is fixed, yay. [surprisingly, no furniture had been moved around! imagine if the guy tried to nudge that... hulk of a wardrobe, and the door fell on him!!] ~ apparently, being able to fill in a registration form with no assistance means awesome Hebrew skillz. oh hell yay. the thing is, I am still allergic to the language, but. give me a good reason, and I'll learn what's needed. just gimme. Tags: rl
mood: amused
sound: HANDLEBARS
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the [more or less] serious fic is... well, stuck at a WTH beginning and now is making me feel sorry about the ending. way to go, me, and I'll have to write it anyway. the decidedly NOT serious, silly really, light-hearted and fluffy fic... drags along. it is about 600 words long this far, and feels like several thousand, and argh, if that is what happens when I try to make people feel good for one effing night... ow. *ow*. the out-of-the-blue WTH fic beats me with let's-see-you- try-to-get-that-right dialogue. what I can do, apparently, is talk crack!Trek to no end. *headdesk* ( and then there's l-space. )Tags: story, бред
mood: cranky
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rewind 
silly
weird
amazed
enthralled
distressed
content
aggravated
accomplished
contemplative
cynical
complacent
curious